In a neverworld, a conversation arises between a naughty kid and a broker named Virodha.
“I have moved on.” said the kid.
“Why? But Why? We have an extensive business and big client base and why would you do that?” replied the man.
“You business doesn’t give me ecstasy.”
“Why is that so? Our platform has brought new features every day, a knowledge repository, we were the first to manage such enormous volumes of trade in the equity market. Even gave you the option for so many spreads; butterfly, straddle, etc. We introduced so many technical indicators for small users benefits. Why more do you need?”
“Your system collapsed with technical glitches so many times and that too during most important days of volatility for swing trades. You just betray during climax, no fun, no ecstasy.”
“See kid, we are big, such volumes are difficult to manage.”
“How big is your big? This much, or this much.” The kid shows the measure with his index finger and thumb.
“Not funny! Now our systems are fine and dandy.”
“You used the same excuse four times in five years; a serious regulator would have castrated you. My naughty uncle works in finance, he says, ‘if there is an error of even a penny caught in audit we take it serious but if repeats again it is already a scam.’”
“But, we have received clearance about it long back, why bring the old skeletons?”
“It is as fresh as a baked pie. I see what you did there, you are betting against your clients and nobody caught you selling user data, not yet.”
“That is outrageous. We don’t sell any data, we only report when our regulators need it.”
“But based on the inputs you provide, the regulators act and the entire market is moving to abba dabba jabba.”
“What is this unintelligent language ‘abba dabbba jabba’ ?”
“It is the language of the grey market that deals with “dabba, dabba”, and the turnovers are huge because onion lady has dampened the sentiment.’
“Who is onion lady?”
“The one who doesn’t eat onions.”
“Then what does she eat?”
“She eats middle income class, business and people.”
“Hmm, I understand. But why onion lady and not ‘No-onion’ lady?”
“It is because, if I use ‘No’ before, then Roman daddy will throw a fit?”
“Who the hell is roman daddy?”
“The one with aspirations of building a Roman Empire on Mars, he even named his kids accordingly.”
“Forget it, it is too confusing. Come back again to my platform. We have new features.”
“Nope, you even sold my data to unknown gold-diggers.”
“But there was no gold.”
“See, that is what I am talking about when you cheat in the game, you get punished.” The kid closes his fist as he mentions this.
“Let’s settle this, I give you money.”
“Nope, I don’t need your money.”
“I will give you candy.”
“Nope, I own the candy store.”
“I will bring a naughty girlfriend, a lot come to my podcast.”
“Nope, I don’t need one.”
“What do you need?”
“I want you to drop your pants, I want to spank you.”
“You are a nasty, naughty kid. Aren’t you afraid of my big business?”
“It is big but lacks performance. I got small business but it packs an explosive punch.”
“What kind of business is yours?”
“Minding my own business.”